February 15, 2018

A Hopeful Start

We're halfway through February already. At times, I can't decide if it feels like both the blink of an eye or a lifetime away since the clock struck midnight on January 1st. For once though, I can say that so much change - both inner and outer - has been happening in my life during these first few weeks of the year, that I'm feeling quite hopeful.

I didn't start 2018 in the best way, actually. For the first couple of weeks, I was incredibly stressed out, and quite ill. To begin with, I was facing some difficult situations and decisions that I wasn't looking forward to at all. Then, although I tried my best to resist the nasty flu that made its way through my family right after the holiday break, it eventually knocked me down for a whole week!

Thankfully, as the flu slowly but surely moved out of my body, somehow so did the stress I was experiencing. The shift started unexpectedly, with listening to a podcast episode that pulled me out of my thought process at the time and helped me consider the situation from a different perspective. That was followed by the lucky timing of some incredibly supportive conversations that happened very closely together, and plenty of reflection time while ill. It was also, of course, backed up by all the personal growth work I've been doing over the last couple of years. And so, I felt myself coming out of this really hard period I've been in, and now I feel stronger than I have in years, maybe ever.

I've listened to advice about how change starts from within for so long, and the past few weeks have been such satisfying confirmation of thatIt doesn't mean that the challenging situations that were causing my stress have disappeared. In fact, if I were to look at them from the same perspective I had only a couple of months ago, I could say that they've gotten even more challenging.

This is why I'm so proud to be in this position, and to have the mindset I do right now, that allows me to keep going every day. It's because I know that whatever change has taken place has nothing to do with external factors. Rather,  it's a result of the work and effort I've put in throughout the last couple of years, to grow and to build myself up, and it feels so good to see clearly how far I've come.

I have many more things to say these days, and I want to show up in this space more consistently, to share what I'm learning, experiencing, and overcoming. For now though, I'll stop here, simply by saying that I'm feeling more energized, motivated, and excited by what's ahead than I've been in a very long time. I have a good feeling about 2018.

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